On Friendship and Community

While writing is a solitary endeavor, writers can’t and don’t live in a vacuum.  As writers, we spend a lot of time alone with our characters.  We hang out with imaginary people, not real ones.  But I know that I wouldn’t have ever published a book, let alone sixteen, without a community of very real people in my life.

I’m lucky to be part of a community of writers who have been together for many years.  Although we see each other in person at writers conferences occasionally, most of our interaction is through the internet and online communities.  I talk to these people daily online and really miss them when I can’t get online for some reason.  We support each other through the ups and downs of writing and publishing as well as whatever life throws at us.  I have a research question, I ask them.  A business question, one or more of these people will know the answer.  A personal issue, good or bad, they’re there for me as well.

I also have a very small group of writer buddies who I see more often and talk to on the phone as well as online.  I depend on them for support, help, and friendship.  These ladies critique with me, brainstorm with me, listen to my woes and joys and I reciprocate.

I’ve thought a lot about my process of writing and for me friends are essential.  Because although the writing itself is solitary, I need someone to bounce ideas off of, plot with, and generally whine to when things aren’t going well.  (Okay, I confess, whining is a large part of my process.)  My family has to endure some of it, but they much prefer when I can convince my friends to listen to me.

Writer friends are fun.  Who else will plot a bomb book with you on an airplane going to a conference?  Of course we couldn’t mention the B word so we had to refer to it as ‘that thing that happened’.  That rated some strange looks from the person seated next to us.  Plotting a murder is even more fun.  Sometimes we don’t tell them we’re writers.  We like to mess with them.:)

Writer friends are essential.  They don’t think you’re weird when you speak of your characters as if they’re real.  They don’t think you’re weird if you tell them you’re merely a vessel for your characters and that the most fun you have is when you simply channel your characters and the words fly from your fingertips.  (Yes, I made the mistake of telling my kids that once and they have never forgotten it, or forgotten to tease me about it.)  Writers don’t think you’re weird if you hear voices in your head, because the odds are, they hear voices too.

So to my community, my friends, thanks for all the years of love and support.  Priceless!

 

 

Eve Gaddy